Daniel Amos Message Board | Print: Hahahahaha!!!!!

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at08:54:

Hahahahaha!!!!!

Hi Mommies!!

Gk! VVVVVVTTT!!! PhBBBBBBBvvvvttckk!! RARF! Visste du att vi ordnar föreläsningar om olika intressanta ämnen?!! Även till föreläsninggggggxxxcckkkkarna är det fri entré efter årsskiftet Mommyyyy!!

Välkommen!

Sweet Sainted Mother of William Conrad where am I???!!gkkxxkck!!

Dato che la documentazione esistente su è moltissima, abbiamo deciso di partire, per la parte di traduzione, dal lavoro di touch my hair da cui abbiamo anche tratto il nome per il progetto italiano. Per questo, la gran please just touch my hair that's all I'm asking parte dei documenti da noi tradotti sono gli ed i mini e le guide di LDP (guide generali su argomenti!!!gk!!!!

helpmemommyWapi choo? Wapi choo? Wapi choo? Nini? Unasemaje? Sijui Mommy! Ita polisi! Wapi choo? Wapi choo? Wapi choo? Nisaidia!

Nina njaa Kopo Ng'ombei Mkate Kuku Mayai Samaki Unga Matunda Barafu Nyama Wali Chumvi Mboga
Maji Hatari! GKK! Tafadhali natakabia [pombe] Windex!

Posted by tchandler on 02-18-2005 at08:55:

good lord, he's on some sort of indutrial-strength Windex and Lavoris bender!! (i'm pretty sure that last part was actual Swahili. good grief...

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at08:55:

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!Analyzed in Bohmian mechanical terms, a map from the initial wave function of this system to the distribution of the forensic result follows directly from the structure of Bohmian mechanics, and from the fact that the MOMMY! quantum equilibrium distribution is quadratic in the wave function, thus, this map is bilinear (or, more precisely, sesquilineargggkkkk!!).

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, my Mommy lies over the oceannnnnnnnnnngk! My moooooooomy lies over the seeeeeeeeeeeeea! My Mommy lies over the o---

Posted by freak on 02-18-2005 at08:56:

i don't think carl is here...

jeesh you are scarying me... i am like just here for the first time and all alone with a...a

dude put down the windex and step away from that sharp implement....

okay fetal position that is cool...

~f

Posted by Eleanor on 02-18-2005 at08:57:

they have windex in swahill? or wherever it is that swahili is spoken Roll Eyes

Posted by tchandler on 02-18-2005 at08:57:

ok, that does it. folks, i'm gonna remotely shutdown berger's computer so that we can talk for a bit. this is just ridiculous. back in a minute.
...
....
.....

there. that should hold him for awhile.

ok. there's something we need to discuss. since berger first logged onto the DAMB, the following has taken place -- he has said/thought/ or insisted that:

--he was born on several consecutive wednesdays, sometime during the MARCH/APRIL period of 1937.

--he "may or may not" have a "slightly unhealthy fixation on Gabe Kaplan of Welcome Back Kotter."

--he has huffed windex with Oden Fong.

--the Hudson Brothers played death metal.

--Dionne Warwick makes 11-string basses.

--Goldie "Hearn", daughter of Chick Hearn, announcer for the San Diego Chickens, was married to Jack Chick and wrote all of his tracts except "The Gay Blade" which was written by Charles Nelson Reilly, George Hamilton, and Chick Corea.

--the best concert he (berger) ever went to was Juice Newton in 1947. (she, of course, wasn't even born yet.)

--his bass parts "choose" him (and i quote, berger in the 3rd person: "Oh, how Berger suffers for his art! There's something Berger needs to say, which is this: that there's something that Berger needs to say, which is this: that Berger has something that he would like to say which is this: all the notes that Berger Played on all the Swirling Eddies songs, all those notes chose HIM. Berger never chose to play those notes, they chose HIM! Berger didn't choose the notes, THE NOTES CHOSE HIM!!")

--he's now mutated into a half-man/half-woman, (in his words, a "french, cheese-eating catwoman"(?!) "buegner le gal"

berger has also:

--decided to run for governor of california, then FORGOT to run for governor of california.

--released this four line "interview." : INTERVIEWER: Hello, Berger.

BERGER: Hi. I have to go now.

INTERVIEWER: Ok. Bye.

BERGER: Bye.

--claimed to suffer from "...a minor hunchback, lower back pain, gouty arthritis of the knee, rickets, shingles, 'sweet potato arm,' strained hemicula, limbago of the limbago, swollen medulla oblongato, hoof in mouth, mogo-on-the ga-go-go, and other tropical diseases.
...spontaneous night-time grunting, flourescent light fainting, paranoic fear of cold mountain air, chronic tree sadness, and periodic, systematic stoplight embarrassment syndrome."

(spontaneous night-time grunting? flourescent light fainting? what the hell is chronic tree sadness??!)

...(sigh) on one hand, he's completely and absolutely mentally deranged and can't help himself. on the other hand, people have often mistaken us for being the same person and that's something that i have to live with.

don't you think that, at the very least, we should all demand a public apology here on the DAMB for all the ridiculous behavior?

Posted by carl on 02-18-2005 at08:59:

Cool

So, Tim, y'r having a rough day too, I see.... Big Grin

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at09:00:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHGGGXXXXCCKKKK!! I'm baaaaaaaaackkkk! Kiss my @$$ Chandler! I ain't sayin' sorry to anyone for anything!! HAHAHGHCK!

Hey, guess what people? I hear Chandler really .sucks on the new Youth Choir Middle-Aged Men or Whatever ablum! HAHAGK! They say he's really lost it! Can't play worth a DAMB anymore!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahgk! gk!

Posted by tchandler on 02-18-2005 at09:04:

folks, i gotta get back to work. i'll try to check in later...(sigh)...

Posted by carl on 02-18-2005 at09:06:

Come now, Berger, don't let jealousy overtake your immortal soul. Chandler does rock, as few in this world can. And I have the fingers on one hand to prove it. Big Grin

Anyway, although I can see your point, I think y'r too focused on this one particular, ahem, "creative venue." I believe we can just safely assume that his bass playing on the latest Choir album is simply once again under "musical house arrest"....

Tongue

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at09:11:

Those are very kind words Mommy, but Chandler .sucks "in his words" and I quote, "big wet hairy volleyballs through a Hoover vacuum."

I'll be checking back throughout the day in between writing songs for my new Forgone Conclusion album if anyone wants to, you know, ggk! .rap or anything.

Posted by carl on 02-18-2005 at09:18:

Shocked

Wow, you could actually hear one Sybilline personality break through the other on THAT one... Shocked

Posted by larryl on 02-18-2005 at09:21:

big fun....berger, tell us more about how your bass parts "choose you" this is an interesting concept Big Grin

how can i get some good guitar parts to find me? Cool

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at09:21:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHgggggggxxck! Way to tell him, carl! That's what I'm talkin' about! YEEEAAAH! THAT'S WHAT I'M TA--

Wait. What? What did you say?

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at09:25:

Hello larryl.

You see, Berger is just like Linda Ronstagggggkkkkt. In the same way that aaaaaaaaaalll of the great songs come and knock on her door like she's in Three's Company, likkkkkkkewise, my bass parts wake me up in the middle of the night, take me to a late dinner, buy me a drink, and then treat me like I'm an amusement park. You digggkk?

Posted by carl on 02-18-2005 at09:28:

Cool

It pretty much explains everything to ME.

Except, of course, how you and Jerry Brown hooked up....

Posted by Berger Roy Al on 02-18-2005 at09:33:

We hookkkggkgkgked up because Jerry grew .tired of Linda Ronstaggkkkt eating 9 pizzas in one sitting every time they went to Pizza Hut which was his favorite restaurant. That and the fact that he likes my half man/half womanness.

Posted by uvulapie on 02-18-2005 at09:40:

Rumors of war

Yesterday, while sharing scones with Jerry Van Dyke at the local Big Lots, the topic of Berger came up. Although he wouldn't tell me Jerry strongly suggested (meaning he held a pneumatic drill bit set to my head - marked down to only $9.99) asking Berger about an incident involving the time Spot brought real puppies into the studio while Camarillo was laying down vocal tracks on "Mr. Sharky".

By the way, the bass line for "Mr. Sharky" kicks royal gutteal tissues. I don't care what Chandler says about you, that line is genius!!!